Moments & Mindfulness

On Mother's Day, I heard this quote from Elder M. Russell Ballard's talk entitled "Daughters of God," and I just loved it.

"Recognize that the joy of motherhood comes in moments. There will be hard times and frustrating times. But amid the challenges, there are shining moments of joy and satisfaction. 

Author Anna Quindlen reminds us not to rush past the fleeting moments. She said: “The biggest mistake I made [as a parent] is the one that most of us make. . . . I did not live in the moment enough. This is particularly clear now that the moment is gone, captured only in photographs. There is one picture of [my three children] sitting in the grass on a quilt in the shadow of the swing set on a summer day, ages six, four, and one. And I wish I could remember what we ate, and what we talked about, and how they sounded, and how they looked when they slept that night. I wish I had not been in such a hurry to get on to the next thing: dinner, bath, book, bed. I wish I had treasured the doing a little more and the getting it done a little less”(Loud and Clear [2004], 10–11)."

That was a good reminder for me.  I have been thinking about that all month, and trying to recognize those special times with my kids and to stop and enjoy them more often.  I have been trying to share at least one "moment" with at least one of my children every day.  I've also been trying to be more "present"-- for lack of a better word.  A lot of times I find myself preoccupied with this or that, and not listening to my children carefully.  I've been trying to just really be all-the-way-there more often; instead of being physically present but mentally thinking about the next thing on my to-do list.

Anyway, there's been a lot of good side effects of being more mindful, one of which is that I have been able to find a little bit of humor in the hard and frustrating and monotonous times in between.

Here is what is going on between those shining moments of joy:  

Yes, we've reached the phase of keeping the bathroom doors CLOSED! 

(unless we want to double our toilet paper consumption.)

Hayden decorates the walls any chance he gets.

He even signs his work with a big "H"

Sydney doesn't want my music to feel neglected so she takes it out of it's storage crate every day.

Sean and Hayden used my rotary blade to embellish my craft table and were careful to make sure the chair matched.

Pillows and cushions that never stay where they belong.

Don't have a clue what they used to scratch up this table.

monotony.

Here's to recognizing those joyful, fleeting moments, and to living in them better.  Because we all know that what goes on between those moments can really kick your butt. 

While my back was turned . . .

Sean thought he would help me out with dinner.

There's nothing like some green sugar sprinkles on chicken.
In honor of St. Patrick's Day, maybe?

Sean's Deviant Behavior Checklist:

• find out exactly how much toilet paper will fit into a toilet
• destroy the piles of folded laundry
• get out of bed multiple times to torment Dallin and Daphne in the other room; get a reaction from them at all costs
• break the child safety latches on the pantry cupboard to regain unrestricted access
• flood the upstairs bathroom until a quarter inch of water has infiltrated each cupboard and drawer, and every towel in the house is needed to mop up the floor
• discover when the tissues stop coming out of the kleenex box
• accomplish each of the above one or more times in a period of three days

Last night, Arthur found me gathering a box worth of tissues off the kitchen floor and said, "What are we going to do with that kid?" to which Dallin replied from the other room, "We should PUT HIM IN JAIL!"

Dallin's Theory

A couple of weeks ago:

Dallin:  Mom, why does Hayden squirm around so much?

Me:  I don't know.  Maybe because he has a giant spirit cooped up in his tiny body.

Dallin:  (smiles) Oh yeah!

Me: Maybe that's why kids have so much energy all the time.

Dallin:  Yeah, I think that's why, Mom.  Our spirits are just too big for our bodies!

Sometimes Sean's spirit tuckers his little body right out.  

This time he just passed right out in the middle of the family room.

He's here . . .

That's right.  This whole pregnancy I was convinced we were having a little girl, so I was very surprised when Arthur said, "It's a boy!"  Daphne was disappointed that it wasn't the sister she was waiting for, but she has since fallen in love with her new little brother.

Hayden James Gariety was born November 30th, (five days early, I'm happy to report) just 31 minutes after we pulled up to the hospital.  He came sooo fast.  I was dilated to an 8/9 when we arrived at Triage, and was rushed to the delivery room where he made his debut just a few minutes later. (Next time we'll head to the hospital a little sooner, I think.)  He was 7 lbs. 5 oz. and 20 inches long.  He is just perfect.  I could just look at his little face and hands and feet all day.  

Dallin and Daphne are so cute with him.  They rush into my room first thing in the morning saying, "I washed my hands with soap and water--can I hold the baby?"  So we have lots of little helpers here.  Sean is going to take some time to adjust to this new addition.  The first few days he basically ignored him, thinking maybe the problem would just go way.  Now he's in a non-committal curious stage.  He acknowledges him sometimes and has displayed some signs of affection.  Someday those two are going to be great friends, but right now, Sean isn't convinced he's the greatest thing ever.  

I'm so glad to have my mom here helping out this week.  She is awesome!  Thank you Dad for surviving without her this week.  She is such a lifesaver!

We are so grateful to add this new little miracle to our family!

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Sean and my Dr. appointment

With my sweet little Sean, there is never a dull moment. To illustrate, here's a description of my most recent Dr. appointment. Dallin was at school, and Daphne at preschool, so instead of getting someone to watch Sean, I brought him along, like it was just another errand.

First off, he insists on bringing in this Lightning McQueen car that is almost as big as he is. So because I'm running late, I don't fight the issue, and he carries it in. Well once we're inside, he got upset about something? and throws that huge car on the floor and starts rolling around on the ground. He made a bit of a scene, but I'm thinking: at least he's not screaming. Thank goodness, that office tends to be very prompt, and I wasn't even waiting two minutes before they called me back. The checkups always start with a routine urine sample. So I'm in the bathroom getting my urine sample (hope this isn't too graphic for you) and Sean decides he's seen enough of the bathroom, and opens the door. (It has one of those handles that you just have to pull down on to unlock, and open.) The bathroom is pretty spacious, so I have to leap off the toilet to close the door before some unsuspecting patient comes around the corner and sees me in all my glory. And of course, once is never enough with Sean, so he does it again, just to keep me on my toes. It was just brilliant.

That, I admit, was the point at which I decided that Sean isn't coming to any more Dr. appointments with me. And of course it didn't help that once we were in the exam room, he occupied himself not with his Lightning McQueen car, but with turning the lights off and on while the Dr. was trying to fill out my charts, and climbing up on the chair and then jumping off over and over, and pressing buttons on the examination table. My doctor was very patient, but I know she had to be thinking, "And you're having another one because . . . ?" She had to be thinking that because I confess, that thought has flitted across my mind occasionally. But then I remember I'm having another one because they're worth it. And I love being a mom. Even when it keeps me on my toes. I can't wait to see what kind of personality this next one will add to the mix.

Anyway, the appointment was short and sweet, thankfully! Even so, when it was over, I felt like I'd been doing aerobics trying to corrale that little boy. I ended up carrying that huge two year old kid, and his almost-as-huge Lightning McQueen car, and the diaper bag out to the car, and was out of breath by the time I'd buckled him in his carseat. I had a doctor once ask me what I did for exercise. I laughed, "Well, I run around after my kids." She didn't even bother to humor me, but dryly replied, "That doesn't count." Oh yeah? Why don't you watch mine for a day, and see if you revise your answer.

First Day of School

Today was Dallin's first day of Kindergarten. Dallin was so excited this morning. He woke up and was dressed and had his bed made before I was even out of bed. He made his own little lunch, and combed his hair and wore his backpack around the house all morning. It was so cute. I took him down to Osuna Elementary where the PTA was putting on a "Boo-Hoo" breakfast, (or for some of the parents, a "woo-hoo!" breakfast.) We had breakfast together and then I gave Dallin a big hug and he went to line up with the other children to go to their classes. There they all were with their backpacks that are almost as big as they are! That's when I lost it. For me, it was definitely a boo-hoo breakfast. I wasn't expecting to cry that much, but I've been really emotional this pregnancy, so I was like a faucet! Dallin just smiled and waved and then he was gone, and I was left with my soggy Kleenex to boo-hoo all the way home. It goes so fast, and you just don't get the time back. We will miss having him home during the day.